Born in Newport News, Virginia, Nelms was introduced to wrestling as a high school junior at Princess Anne High School in Virginia Beach. After graduating in 1960, Nelms served in the United States Navy until 1968 and was a combat veteran. As a plane captain in an anti-submarine warfare squadron, Nelms saw action in Guantanamo Bay in 1962 during the Cuban Missile Crisis. Nelms earned an undergraduate degree in Education and a graduate degree in Marine Biology from the Norfolk College of William and Mary (today Old Dominion) in Norfolk. While in college, Nelms remained active as a wrestler and was an intramural champion at 189 lbs.

Nelms’ 40-year coaching and officiating career began in 1969 when he started a wrestling program at Bayside Junior High School in Virginia Beach. In his first season, his team captured a city league championship. In 1970, he was recruited to start a wrestling program at Booker T. Washington High School in Norfolk. While at Booker T. Washington, Nelms also founded a Marine Biology program. In 1978, Nelms moved to the village of Corolla on the Outer Banks in Currituck County, North Carolina. There he coached and helped start wrestling teams at Cape Hatteras and Manteo in addition to coaching at Currituck High School.

In 1983, Nelms started officiating due to a lack of referees in the area. Traveling up to three or more hours to remote areas in the Outer Banks was a huge obstacle for Eastern North Carolina officials, but not for Nelms. He would travel long distances to call matches and sometimes stay overnight with other coaches or in school gyms. For many years, Nelms was the only wrestling official east of Greenville and would cover high school and college matches and tournaments at Currituck High School, Manteo High School, Cape Hatteras High School, Chowan University, and Elizabeth City State University. During his 31-year tenure officiating matches in Northeastern North Carolina, Nelms earned a reputation as a skilled and fair official. He called multiple regional and state championships and in 2021 was recognized with the Dick Knox “Golden Whistle” Award by the NCHSAA. Nelms called his final tournament in January 2024 at the age of 81.

Outside of wrestling, Nelms was elected to serve as a Currituck County Commissioner in 1986 and 2006 with appointments as both Vice Chairman and Chairman. In 2009-2010, he was the elected Chairman of the Albemarle Commission representing seven counties in Northeastern North Carolina. Under his leadership as Chairman, Currituck was recognized by the state Board of Education as the top Board of Commissioners in North Carolina. For 21 years Nelms has sponsored the Navy SEAL Tribute Ride that financially supports the National Navy SEAL Museum’s Trident Houses. He currently lives in Poplar Branch with his wife Donna and is the owner of Barry’s on Walnut Island Restaurant and Lodge.